It can be daunting when you base your film on deeply personal and tragic experiences that shaped your life. Artist Nadine Crocker (Desperation in Road) did just that in Continue which was born from a dark period in her life when she was involuntarily institutionalized after a failed suicide attempt due to depression. Her poignant film stars Shiloh Fernandez, Lio Tipton, Kat Foster, Annapurna Sriram and Emily Deschanel in addition to herself.
Continue On is the name of the non-profit organization she founded to raise awareness and offer subsidies for underprivileged youth to access mental health and suicide prevention services. Nadine spoke with Creative Screenwriting Magazine about her motivation and intention for her film.
Nadine Crocker deliberately changed certain details in Continue so it wasn’t fully autobiographical. Instead, it is “based on true events” comprising merging and rearranging characters and events to tell the significant components of her story. Her key aim is to “start a conversation and shine a light on mental health, depression, suicidal ideation and help educate in the small way that I could,” she opines.
Trenton (Shiloh Fernandez) Photo courtesy of Lionsgate
Beyond sharing her story of multiple suicide attempts, she also wants to show people in a similar situation that they’re not alone in their struggle.
The Writing Process
While Nadine was writing Continue, she thought about the best way to communicate her story rather than simply transcribing moments from her life. She is grateful to be a survivor and is now, also a mother, a wife, and a filmmaker.
“It’s all things that I would have never gotten a chance to experience if it wasn’t for surviving that night.”
She opens her film at the end of that fateful night when she made an unsuccessful suicide attempt and “thrust the audience into that world.” Then she worked backwards to tell her story.
Balancing Hope And Pain
Crocker has mountains of real life stories to draw from, but she had to condense them into a two-hour narrative. For her, the guiding thematic principle was equally balancing hope with pain. She honored every relationship in Continue and ensured every character had an arc. “There is no unimportant character in the movie,” she notes.
“They all had a story, because in the end, my whole message is that our one life ends up influencing and changing so many other lives around us.”
Most of the characters in Continue are actually based around me and other struggles
She elaborates on her tumultuous relationship with her family and her struggles with addiction. The therapist in Continue is an amalgamation of various people who helped her in her life.
Janet (Emily Deschanel) Photo courtesy of Lionsgate
“All the most beautiful movie moments I’ve experienced in my life are put into one love story. It’s pulling from all of the beauty, all of the pain, and all of the people who have helped me.”
There is so much rich substance to her story that her first draft came in at one hundred and sixty five pages. Naturally the editing process was strict and disciplined, but Nadine maintained all the essential story elements in her script. The story is heavy going, but she didn’t want to see it descend into a melodrama.
I want audiences to feel hopeful even after I punched them in the gut
She challenged that popular practice that discussing suicide ideation is taboo, so it was difficult to get Continue off the ground. “We don’t talk about mental health. That’s exactly why we need to do it.” Crocker watched films like Requiem For A Dream and Girl Interrupted for creative stimulation. “I love dark, poignant and heavy movies like Blue Valentine and David Fincher’s Seven. Then there’s a burst of light.”
Mental Health Is A Disease And Should Be Treated As Such
Continue has an important social function – to educate the public that mental health issues are a disease.
“They think that the person is choosing them, or they think that the person is crazy. There are so many damaging perspectives and misconceptions around suicide, mental health, and depression. Educating an audience will hopefully activate their empathy.”
Bria (Lio Tipton) & Dean (Nadine Crocker) Photo courtesy of Lionsgate
Nadine Crocker wants the audience to feel what the characters are feeling. Not just one feeling, but a range of them for a holistic cinematic experience.
For many people, visiting a psychiatrist or a mental health facility for a time is when their healing ends. According to Nadine, that’s where it actually begins. Healing is a lifelong pursuit.
Depression is a disease of isolation and you feel like a burden to others
A large part of the recovery process is creating a community and listening to others. “A lot of times, I’m not even saying anything. I’m just holding space for the person. I’m supporting them and crying with them in a safe space.”
The Importance Of Friendships
“I wanted Shiloh to be just as important as Trenton who is just as important as Bria.”
“All the friendships and the love that change our lives are equal and not one of them is prioritized higher. It’s one great love. There will still be struggle. There will still be loss. Life isn’t perfect. But friendships make it easier.”
It’s been quite the journey for Nadine. She became more tenacious. She gained an “unshakable confidence” and discovered her purpose. She stays focused on these things moving forward.
Crocker has a number of projects in the works. She wants to “make an impact, elevate important subject matter, and make a difference.” If one thing in her films resonates with others, then she’s had a good day.
Apart from giving kids access to mental health services, Nadine would like to see more “teaching these kids coping mechanisms or in school anything or anything about mental health.”
[More: Writing Accurate Portrayals Of Mental Health On Screen]
